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Petitions are requests villagers make to the monarch of the kingdom. While a monarch is seated on their throne and holding court, sims in the kingdom will approach them with petitions. These petitions ask for advice, justice, leadership, and (more often than not) money. The decisions the monarch makes will alter their popularity amongst the villagers and the amount of money in the royal treasury, usually in opposite directions. A very popular monarch will be bowed to, a highly unpopular monarch will be booed.

List of petitions[]

Petition Text Choices Cost/Income Popularity Effect
Great One, I dug up this lockbox of gold on my farm. The constable demands I give it to the kingdom. Must I? My farm is failing and I could use this money to plant more crops! The gold is yours!
That soil, and anything in it, is yours. It doesn't matter if it is planted or dug up. You may use the gold for your farm.
§0 Massive Increase
Hey, free money!
How big of a lockbox? Eh, doesn't matter, just let me have all of the gold. Your kingdom thanks you.
+§200 Decrease
Great One, the equipment we use to test witches is considered outdated and barbaric. I ask you to finance some upgrades so that our equipment may be new and barbaric. Let's do it!
Those witches are crafty! We can't give them the opportunity to outsmart our obsolete testing methods.
-§100 Great Increase
Too expensive...
Yes, the equipment is a little antiquated, but it's never been wrong! I can't justify the cost at this time.
0 Slight Decrease
Hi, Your Highness. I'm, um, a little short on Gold Simoles this week and I need to buy some groceries. Can I borrow §20? Sure
Well, the Crown is not really accustomed to loaning cash to random citizens, but anything for my subjects, I guess!
-§20 Increase
No!
..."Groceries", huh? "Borrow", huh?
0 (Decrease with petitioner only)
I'm ruined!! A freak frost suddenly descended on my farm and destroyed all of my tomatoes! Why does this keep happening to me? Help out
I would hate to go without your world-famous tomatoes. Perhaps a little gold will help you recover from your losses.
-§150 Massive Increase
It's lesson time!
A good farmer must prepare for lean years. Natural disasters, even bizarrely localized ones such as yours, are bound to happen. Next year your crop will be stronger.
§0 Slight Decrease
I request permission to run special... experiments in my cellar. I will need funds for blades and harnesses, and I need soundproofing for the walls strong enough to muffle, say, loud screaming. Sounds Great!
Well, that all seems on the level. Here is some gold to get you started. Best of luck to you!
-§50 (Increase with petitioner only)
Riiighht...
Yes, um... Why don't you find the constable and detail your plans with him? I'm sure he'll get you all set up, thank you. Next, please!
0 Increase (Decrease with petitioner)
I seek guidance. A neighbor always leaves out food and attracts stray dogs. They're mean! They taunt our chicken and eat our shoes! What should we do? Bribe me
For a donation to the royal coffers, I will sentence your neighbor to death, ensuring that the dogs will move away.
+§100 Great Decrease
Move your family
Here's a simple solution: move your house where there aren't any dogs living nearby.
§0 Increase
I seek to start a candy shop in the outer village. Would the throne be willing to finance my endeavor? I believe it will bring much needed happiness to the kingdom. Finance it!
This seems like a great addition to the outer village. I will finance it with my own money!
-§500 Massive Increase
Denied!
The royal treasury is not a bank. Go find a moneylender for your enterprises!
§0 Slight Decrease
I want my son to learn the trade that has been in our family for generations, but he wants to join the theater and travel the world. I don't know what to do! Follow your heart!
The boy must follow his own path. That's all any of us can do. If you love him, you must set him free.
§0 Increase
Get out of here!
The Monarch is not here to solve your every trifling quandary. I have a kingdom to run. BEGONE!!
§0 (Increase with petitioner only)
I wish to erect a statue of Your Majesty in the outer village -- one worthy of your visage! It will remind those villagers who's Monarch, you know? I merely ask to have the cost of materials covered. Erect it!
Hmm, a giant statue of me. That could have a lot of uses... People could tip their hats to it, fear it, that kind of thing. I'll allow it!
-§500 Massive Increase
Reject it!
I would rather be remembered by my deeds. There are better uses for the kingdom's resources than feckless expressions of vanity.
§0 (Decrease with petitioner only)
I would like to have a female sheep from the royal flock. All my ewes died. May I please have one? Grant an Ewe
I cannot let my poor subject's flock die out.
-§50 Increase
No Ewe for You!
The monarch is not to be bothered with the affairs of livestock.
§0 Slight Decrease
I've been curious about this new fad of wearing eyepatches, but which eye does Your Majesty favor? The choice is clear.
Uh...left?
0 Great Increase
Does it Matter?
Whichever you think best.
0 Great Decrease
Mighty One, I have a problem. I am possessed by demons. That's not the problem, though. The problem is that I am beginning to like it. What should I do? Get to a church!
If you're enjoying it, that's the first sign that something is wrong. Get to a church immediately and tell them the Monarch has authorized their strongest exorcism.
0 Increase
Get to a tavern!
There is only one place to go when you feel that good: a tavern. Go and share your newfound zeal for merrymaking. Enjoy!
0 Increase
My father will not allow me to marry, but I am in love and wish to marry my sweetheart. May I have permission by royal decree? Granted
Love conquers all!
0 Increase
Denied
Learn to obey and respect your elders!
0 Increase (Decrease with petitioner)
My liege, I ask you to fund a voyage into the unknown. I shall sail in your name and discover the secrets of the world around us. Knowledge! Treasure! Glory! These things can be yours! Absolutely!
Yes! I like all of those things! Go in my name and discover many wonders!
-§100 Great Increase
Absolutely not!
My highest level of concern begins with me. Everything else in the world exists in concentric rings of lessening importance as they get further away from me. Once you go outside the area I have direct rule over, interest drops off sharply. I'm going to say no.
§0 None (Decrease with petitioner)
My liege, I have little money and no possessions save a peasant-grade lute. I live only on donations from kind citizens and from performing for the local children. But now I must produce §300 or I'll lose my home! Take pity...
Musicians are beloved in the community. It would not reflect well on the Monarchy if I allow one of their favorite performers to become a homeless beggar.
-§300 Massive Increase
No pity for you!
The castle cannot simply dispense large sums of money to every sad person living in the kingdom. If I give hand-outs now, where will they end?
§0 Decrease
My liege, some of our younger, more impulsive citizens have taken up a new sport called "dragon taunting." It is very dangerous. How can we discourage them? Outlaw it!
I will not stand for this kind of foolishness in my kingdom. We have enough problems without our children going around poking dragons with sticks! It is banned!
§0 Increase
Regulate it!
Hmm, if I appoint somebody to be commissioner of dragon taunting and then charge admission, I bet the kingdom could make some extra gold...
§? Slight Decrease
My neighbor's pig broke into my yard and ate all my CABBAGES! It's a cabbage disaster. I demand recompense for the two cabbages I lost. Recompense!! Okay
Fine, here's three Gold Simoles for your cabbages. Happy?
-§3 Slight Increase
...Really?
Dear me, how will the kingdom survive after the loss of two whole cabbages? Get out of here. Solve your own problems.
§0 (Decrease with petitioner only)
My neighbor has trimmed his shrubs into rude and vulgar shapes. I seek permission to burn them to the ground with fire. Light it up!
Fire is a good tool -- it's both powerful and completely under our control. I will allow this.
§0 Slight Increase
Fire seems bad...
There is no law that strictly prohibits vulgar shrubbery... not unless it portrays the Monarch in a negative light. Permission must be denied.
§0 (Decrease with petitioner only)
The Kingball Watcher's Cup tournament is scheduled for next week, but the league is completely broke! How can we hold the big game, Your Highness?! Sponsor the game
I will sponsor the tournament myself. The championship is important for kingdom morale. Even I look forward to the big game!
-§1,000 Massive Increase
Charge admission!
If the people want their sports, then they can afford a pittance for admission. It should cover the costs of the game and leave a little left over for the kingdom!
+§1,000 Massive Decrease
Wise one, please settle a bet. Best Kingball player ever: Randalf Galamand or Shubby Botswick? Galamand!
Galamand had the strongest backhand in the game, and his midsection was forged of iron! The man could take a Kingball to the gut, I say!
None Increase
Botswick!
Shubby may not have been as flashy as Randalf, but his fundamentals were solid. Plus, he played over five-thousand times without missing a game! Inspirational!
None Increase (Decrease with petitioner)
Your Highness! Merchants report that your primary shipping route has come under attack from a dire whale! We must fund an expedition to find it and destroy it with the Holy Harpoon. Destroy the whale!
This cannot be allowed! The whale must be stopped... no matter the cost.
-§400 Massive Increase
Your whale is fail
There are no dire whales, and I will not waste resources chasing down some merchant's silly superstition.
§0 Increase (Decrease with petitioner)
Your Highness, the work conditions in the fields are deplorable. Your subjects work long, hard days, they are barely compensated, and moral is plummeting. I think we should give the workers a delightful fruit basket to improve moral.

Sounds good! Everybody loves fruit baskets! If the sight of a shiny new fruit basket does not bring a smile to your face, then your heart is made of stone, sir. I say yes.

-§50 Great Increase

No way! No, no. If we start pampering these workers now, then we'll never hear the end of it. Better that they think things will never improve -- that way they can resign themselves to the job completely. And that's good for productivity!

None Decrease
Your Highness, your advisors are predicting a sharp rise in the desire for goat's milk. Might now be a prudent time to increase the Goat Tax? Tax those goats!
Bless those little goats and their little golden udders! I love this idea. The tax shall be raised.
+§200 Great Decrease
Read my lips...
I will not take advantage of the people's need for basis staples. The current tax is sufficient.
0 Great Increase
Your Majesty, I know I'm of humble birth, but I've always dreamed of joining the nobility. Could you grant me a noble title? You wouldn't even have to give me any land! Why Not?
Sure, I dub thee...Archmarquis of Crafthole.
§0 Massive Increase
Never!
If I give you a title, then everyone will be wanting one too! Request denied, peasant.
§0 Slight Decrease
Your Majesty, I, your humble servant, wish to begin a family. May I have your permission to conceive a child? What? Of course!
You don't need the Monarch's permission to have a child. That's just something you can do. Go have a child! Be well!
§0 (Increase with petitioner only)
Know what? No
Are you kidding? You want my permission to breed. You know what? No. Just because you asked me: no. You are banned from having children.
§0 (Decrease with petitioner only)
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